The journey to Find-U is unique to each individual, as it is a deeply personal and introspective process. Many tools can help, but even this has to do with who you are. There is no right and wrong here, and you can go through this process as you like - as long as it is leading you deeper into yourself.,

Finding yourself is growing in self-awareness. This is an ongoing task, and the more aware you are, the more aware you can be. This involves paying attention to your thoughts, emotions, values, strengths, weaknesses, and desires. 

But how do you do this? In my book, “12 steps to Find-U”, I share my experience on getting in touch with myself - connecting with my emotions, my body, my values - and provide tools you can also try.

One thing I did not talk about in the book as a separate tool, as it was embedded on the other ones, was reflection and introspection. This is what I would like to propose as a first step for finding yourself.

What does “reflection and introspection” mean in practice? It means having a deep conversation with yourself. This can happen in many ways: some people journal (I do!), others meditate, others just sit in solitude (I also do this), others run. Frequently, I do 1000-pieces puzzles to slow my thoughts down and reflect on important questions. Gardening also works for me, if I have too much energy and need to channel it somehow. As I said, no right or wrong here.

Now, you will only figure out what works for you if you try it. So the first step of this first step is: schedule this date with yourself. Add a time in your calendar where you will spend time with yourself. You can start with 10 minutes daily. I journal mostly every day for 20 minutes, always at the same time in the morning on work days, and at different times on weekends.

If you already have an idea of how you reflect well, start with doing that, and see how it goes. If you don't know what works, choose a quiet, comfortable spot, and just sit there and try to notice what you feel like doing. You can have prepared next to you pen and paper, or a coloring book. Have something to “rescue you” in case you get bored and want to run away from your own date. 

Try different things until something feels right, but make sure to be consistent - do it every day, and once something feels right, repeat it some times and adjust.

For example, if you realize you like journaling after all, you can get a pretty notebook (not the cheap one, but something that inspires you). You can figure out what size of notebooks you like, and if the pages should be blank, with lines, dots or squares. You might want a small notebook you can carry with you easily. Some other people prefer typing or dictating (although the phone and computer bring too many distractions and can sabotage your date with yourself).

You can also work on your reflection space or, as I call it, my “thinking space”. Different spaces have different energies. Just like you should not work in the same room or space where you sleep, you can also choose what you do in each space. My thinking space at home is a hammock. I sit there for journaling, for planning, and for therapy or coaching (when I am the coachee). So once you figure out what you like doing on your date with yourself, you can build the perfect space for you.

Then, just continue meeting yourself, and you will be way ahead on your journey to Find-U. Let me know how it goes!

Yours,